[-137-]
THE PUBLIC-HOUSE WITH A BILLIARD-ROOM
Is a great attraction in some places. We knew a whole town upset by the fact
that the landlord of the "Swan" had fitted up a billiard-room. I and
Wiggins and, Foley and Jobson spent at one time, I regret to say, a good deal of
time there. I am warning the reader against the follies of my youth; but Foley
failed, and Jobson and Wiggins, after having had their debts paid three or four
times by their friends, I believe are now following that eminently healthy
occupation called gold-digging, somewhere in Australia. Then I think of that
little town in South Wales, and of the "Angel," under whose too
hospitable roof we used to meet. One of us was an M.P.'s son; he is now, I
believe, dragging down a father's grey hairs with sorrow to the grave. Another
of us bore a name dear to every Englishman; he, I believe, is pensioned off by
his family, and lives as he can on the [-138-] handsome
allowance of a guinea a-week. But these London billiard-rooms are fifty times
more pernicious. There are some five or six hundred connected with
public-houses. There are in all our large thoroughfares separate rooms licensed
for this game, but at these drinking often goes on. And thus the two excitements
acting on the man, he is impelled downwards with an increasing power. I have
seen in these rooms officers and secretaries of public companies in a night
losing, I am sure, a quarter's salary. I have seen young fellows completely
ruined. There was not, when I first knew him, a more promising, gentlemanly
young fellow than Smethwicke, and now, they tell me, he is in Marylebone
Workhouse.
We are told that men are grown-up children. This saying
forcibly occurred to me the last time I was in a billiard-room. After I had
recovered from the feeling of suffocation which an atmosphere infected by gas
and smoke had produced, I observed a number of men with long sticks trying to
knock a number of various-coloured balls into any of the six pockets of the
billiard- table. At each unsuccessful attempt a chorus of observations were made
by the players, not [-139-] remarkable for their
novelty, for the vocabulary of the billiard-room is very limited, such as
"Not within a mile"-" I didn't play for you, Bob " -
"It smelt the hole," &c. &c. At each successful attempt the
chorus was still more animated, but not more original, as "Good
stroke," -"Bad flewke" - "On the red," &c. &c.
The game that was being played was called "pool." A number of people
put each 2s. or 3s., as they may choose to arrange it, and they have each a ball
of a different colour - red, blue, pink, yellow, white, brown, black. Each
player has what is called three lives, and each time he is put in by a player -
for they play in turn - he pays six-pence or a shilling, according to
arrangement, and loses a life, whilst the successful player is allowed to play
again upon the ball which happens to be nearest. The money in the pool is
ultimately divided between the two players who have kept their three lives the
longest. It will be seen that, if everything is straightforward, the best player
has the best chance of dividing the pool or taking the lives. But, unhappily,
this game, so child-like in appearance, is not always innocent. It may happen
two players, gifted by nature with conveniently elastic con-[-140-]sciences,
and a very confused notion of right and wrong, may arrange when they play upon
each other to purposely avoid putting the ball in. Of course, each time this
omission is made it is equal to the owner of the ball having an extra life, and
of course makes the division of the pool almost a certainty. Perhaps at the end
of the evening the two gentlemen, "who merely play for their
amusement," may be seen under a lamppost dividing the spoil. The other
games are pyramids and billiards, which it is unnecessary to describe. I will
simply remark that the best player should win the game; but this is not always
the case. Alas! for human nature! Sharps lose to win; muffs win to lose (the
term "muff" is applied to an indifferent player). After this not very
flattering description the reader would doubtless like to know who frequent
these places. A very large majority are gentlemen - men who are perfectly
incapable of doing anything but what is strictly honest; the minority are
billiard sharks. The gentlemen play because it is a source of excitement; the
sharks, because it is a source of profit. There are also some who play only for
amusement with gentlemen like themselves, and never risk be-[-141-]yond
a shilling or so; and others, mere lookers-on, who, fatigued by their daily
labours, prefer a dolce far niente to the trouble of theatres, &c.,
and who read the paper, drink their brandy and water, and smoke their cigar,
without either playing. or making a bet.
It is not easier to distinguish a gentleman in a
billiard-room than elsewhere, but without wishing to be personal, it is
desirable the stranger should keep at a distance those individuals who are so
very familiar and friendly with every one, and who keep a piece of chalk in
their waistcoat pocket. These people cannot be insulted; they carefully avoid
squabbles, which may bring about disagreeable insinuations; they prefer pursuing
the even tenor of their way, "picking up" as many people as they can.
See yonder old man who totters across the room; his trade is swindling, his
goods are lies, his recreation is obscenity and blasphemy; his palsied hand can
scarcely grasp a cue, and yet there are few who can excel him; by concealing his
game carefully he has won, and can win hundreds, from his victims, who, thinking
nothing of his skill, are astonished, as he pretends to be himself, at his luck.
The young wife tossing restlessly in her [-142-] bed,
and wondering what can keep her lord so long at business, little knows,
when he returns home flushed and excited, that he has been fleeced of money he
can ill afford to lose; whilst the sharer of the domestic joys of the billiard
shark basks in the sunshine of his momentary good humour, as he displays with a
sardonic smile the gold which perhaps never belonged to the dupe who lost it.
But the night is closing on us; we have seen enough for once. Come away.